For over twenty years I’ve personally suffered the effects of Parental Alienation. I know how it feels to feel half alive while wondering when the madness of Parental Alienation will end.  To this day, I wonder when I will be restored in a parental relationship with my daughter Alexis.

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We often look internally to consider our own flaws to find the specific reason for the rejection from our children.  At some point, we realize we offered our love, kindness, and the spirit to be a loving parent, but we live a fractured life with long suffering.  

Parental Alienation drains our hope and energy.  We find ourselves exiled from our children’s lives as if we are marooned on a deserted island with the very real fear that we may never see them again.

Personally speaking, I endured the insults and the vast financial harm brought on by my former wife.  Later, I turned my near hopeless marooned heart into legal victory but have been without a reunion with Alexis.  My daughter has been poisoned against me, despite my wins in court. Her mother used every tactic she could to run out the clock until my daughter reached the age of majority.  And all that time, her mother continued the steady drip of a slam campaign against me by keeping her from me. 

Victory is your choice.  We can either muddle about in loss and linger down the road of abandonment, or we can overcome and live a life of meaning, passion, and joy. 

While the above is important to note, I want to encourage you to recognize the abusive alienator may meet the clinical definition of several or more definitions, but at the playground they are still called bullies. 

My Bully Story

It was in seventh grade at Blacksburg Middle School, located in Blacksburg, VA.  A kid often demanded I give him my lunch money.  He was much taller than I was, and he called me names.  At that point in my life, I was afraid of him and how he could hurt me.  For several days out of nearly a month I arrived home hungry and demoralized because I had given him my lunch money.   One day my grandpa Thomas asked, “What’s wrong?” and I told him the story.  I’ll never forget what he said, “Darel, it's time to stand up for yourself and tell him NO.  Don’t go to your mom and tell her I told you this, but you must handle this on your own.”  The following Monday at school before classes began, the bully walked towards me, but before he was standing in front of me, I yelled at him and told him NO MORE!  The kids in the hallway had always mostly ignored me, so I truly felt invisible to everyone.  This kid walked up to me and balled his fists.  Before he hit me, I ran towards him and pushed him into an open hallway locker and shut the locker door.  Soon after, all the kids began laughing, but I honestly thought they were laughing at me.  Imagine how stunned I was when I turned around as someone let him out of the locker.  During my pushback on him, he had got a bloody nose. He walked away quickly and never bullied me again. 

Today’s article also includes a Hollywood movie clip from one of my favorite movies, TOMBSTSONE.  I love watching old western movies and this one has a multi-faceted plot. 

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Notice:  The video post may not allow for second party views from any third-party website.  I post a warning to this fact.  If you are not able to view the clip above, just follow YouTube’s instructions and follow the link to view the clip, or you may click here for a direct link to the clip. 

The person who posted this clip titled it, “Tombstone “Bitch Slap.

Let me be clear, I’m not condoning violence against anyone.  However, the spirit of this particular clip addresses the bully in town.  You must address the bullies in your own life, but try to do so peacefully, but defend yourself if required. 

My hope is that today’s article will bring into focus the reality of those who bully with parental alienation.  Hopefully, my childhood story will elevate your mood to overcome the bullying aspect of PA.  I also believe the Tombstone clip may will show the actions and spirit of the bully in the saloon has been around since the beginning of man.

Parents who abuse the other with parental alienation are also bullies; their positions must be challenged.  This can be done peacefully and legally.

Important